Digital Raven (digitalraven) wrote,
Digital Raven

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Happy Bastard's Day

Now this, gentle reader, is pure egotism. And I don't give a fuck. It's something I came up with last year, when I was stuck pissing my 21st away with my brother, his grillfiend[1] and a load of their mates, not one of whom I know. So, I thought "The fuck with that. I'm not having that as my 21st celebration. I'm making this some kind of international holiday!"

So I did. What follows is the pertinent part of the Enemy Territory I sent out just before my 21st. It shouldn't be a one-off, though. Mark it as a holiday no matter how old I am. May 17th. Bastard's Day. You'll thank me later.

One thing I don't want any of you to forget is Bastard's Day. That's right, if Guy Fawkes gets all us Brits a day off, I should get everyone a day off. Hence, Bastard's Day. It's a simple enough holiday to celebrate. During the day you do as little as possible, save using it as an excuse to get out of doing things you don't want to do ("But I can't marry you, Jim. It's Bastard's Day!"). Then, on the night, you go out and get absolutely, roaringly shit-faced. Your reason? You're my distributed piss-up. If I can't gather the people I want to spend the day with to me that we can go drinking, we simply all go drinking on the same day. The only rule is that you must drink at least one double vodka, as that is what you are drinking for me by proxy.

If this works, I'll be more amazed than anyone.

In other news, I'm working on a manifesto. I dunno what's going to be in it. I don;t want to just reprise my Bastard's Manifesto, as then I'd just be going back and being boring. No, this is going to be something new. When I think of something to include in it.

[1]: Both of whom have been verbally eviscerated here in entries passim.

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